loy·al·ty/ˈloiəltē/
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A "relationship" trend Im definetly NOT loving is the one where people (okay, us ladies) are being loyal to guys we are "just talking to" or just dating...I realize times might be tough out there in these mean single streets, trust me I know BUT we must not let that influence us into making bad decisions.
Our culture, is big on loyalty. I get that and I am an advocate of loyalty to friends and family who are deserving, or otherwise I may definetly NOT have your back.lol.
In my opinion, a lot of these premature loyalty issues stem from lack of self esteem. I know and I can write about this topic because I've been there before so Im not here to judge, Im here to guide. The absense of self esteem or presense of insecurity tends to always make us feel that we have to prove ourselves to others in order to get their approval. The thought is, once they see that we've proven ourselves, we pass the test and by passing the test, we go on to the "next level"...whatever that may be, which is usually us getting a step closer to relationship status.
For instance, in my past insecurity filled life, once I considered myself officially "talking" (i'll do a whole other blog on what 'talking' is.lol) then in my head I felt I had certain obligations to him. I would go out and not give out my number to other guys, I'd refuse dates, cancel prior activities for quality time with "him" etc etc etc. I look back now and laugh.
Loyalty to the wrong person, especially too soon can lead to many bad decisions; the most common one being having sex too soon with a person, especially unprotected! Unless you are getting your groove back or are just mentally prepared and sexually liberated enough to seperate sex from emotions, I would not advise sleeping with someone who you're just dating because most likely he will just turn into a friend with benefits and NOT a boyfriend...and let's be honest here, we dont really want any more friends with benefits!
It's all as simple as this : If you are single, you dont have a boyfriend. Period. Dating other people is not cheating. I know I used to feel bad, but the reality of the dating situation is if it's not monogomous than there is no such thing as cheating. Simple as that. Even if you like the person and the person likes you, until it's official you are fare game. And trust me when I say that a lot of the things we wouldnt hesitate to do for the sake of "him", he would not think twice about doing to you, keep that in mind.
All Im saying is your loyalty should ONLY be reserved for those who have proven themselves worthy.If you take nothing else from this post, take this: YOU ARE ENOUGH! It's time for us to stop feeling the need to prove ourselves to anyone, ESPECIALLY for those who not do the same for us
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